Xiuqian
Monday, January 18, 2010 @
Hai. Never thought it'd be over like that. Really lost now and don't know what will become of me. Why don't i just get hit by a car or maybe fall off from a flight of stairs and hope i get a serious memory loss so i wont be that miserable, guilt-stricken anymore. I wanna escape from all these. I wanna run away. I cant face it - alone./ I don't know what to do. I've tried. I did not give up but what saddens me is that, it's no use. It's too late. Nothing's gonna be like what it used to ; Never. No matter how hard i try, it's just gonna remain like that. I don't wanna be friends, neither stranger. But i have no choice. It's either this or that;. Many things are beyond my control. But i tried holding back and changing my destiny. All i ask for is a chance. Maybe, i'm just short of opportunities. I'm aat a loss. Probably, the old xiuqian is gone. Never ever gonna be the same again. No happiness, just sadness. All these, i've been through too much. Too much to feel. Just numbness, unfeeling, cold-hearted. As i write and tear, i know very well how much i feel for you. I know it, deep down. No matter how much tears i've cried, facts are just gonna remain like that. But i know those tears have dried, but my heart will never. Goodbye.

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